im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize