He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize