Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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