Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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