take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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