Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
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Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize