What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
