Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
