I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
