Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Randomize
