Me. At least after what I've been through.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
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We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
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I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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