This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
