I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
