She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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