i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
We talked him into tasing himself.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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