One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
