I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Even my vagina gasped.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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