using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Enjoy the penises
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
