just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
