He kissed a someone with a penis
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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