another moral hangover. fuck.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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