Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Randomize