i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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