HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
