Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
