Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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