This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
