If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
