1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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