The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have feelings for this penis?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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