i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Alive.
So much puke
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
