guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
