Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
