theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
