and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
