census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
