U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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