and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
