Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
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I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
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The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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