wakey wakey hands off snakey
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
