Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
she looked like the before picture.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
