none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Tell her she can't have a vagina
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
