Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
