who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Randomize