in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
