i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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