The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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