Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
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i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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