So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
