Texts From Last Night

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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.

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  (709): just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq. http://tfl.nu/wl24
  Replies (16) Good night (5019) Bad night (687)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.

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  (303): normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective. http://tfl.nu/9jpo
  Replies (28) Good night (5494) Bad night (692)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.

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  (910): And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship. http://tfl.nu/btcq
  Replies (17) Good night (4667) Bad night (2056)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.

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  (416): I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of. http://tfl.nu/16vh
  Replies (23) Good night (4330) Bad night (1700)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday

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  (313): is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday http://tfl.nu/9ppn
  Replies (6) Good night (3611) Bad night (798)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread

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  (910): I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread http://tfl.nu/evst
  Replies (21) Good night (3648) Bad night (1792)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog

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  (312): Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog http://tfl.nu/dk0r
  Replies (23) Good night (5070) Bad night (900)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.

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  (303): I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick. http://tfl.nu/7vfn
  Replies (3) Good night (560) Bad night (1574)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.

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  (570): Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone. http://tfl.nu/7xsv
  Replies (6) Good night (1537) Bad night (617)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.

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  (908): Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud. http://tfl.nu/9hne
  Replies (1) Good night (985) Bad night (388)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.

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  (520): I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013. http://tfl.nu/sp2x
  Replies (2) Good night (814) Bad night (324)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.

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  (804): hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too. http://tfl.nu/g160
  Replies (4) Good night (1317) Bad night (362)
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  (315): View more from New York

  Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire

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  (315): Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire http://tfl.nu/4zum
  Replies (7) Good night (735) Bad night (297)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move

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  (727): I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move http://tfl.nu/nqhs
  Replies (3) Good night (506) Bad night (264)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.

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  (423): Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days. http://tfl.nu/aq3h
  Replies (3) Good night (959) Bad night (256)

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