I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
