Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize